The Tiny Voice of Reason

5 Things I Wish I Had Been Taught In School: College & Employment

When I attended high school we had a class on careers and the one thing that was pushed was higher education.  The main focus of the school during senior year was to get as much of the senior class accepted into college.  What they showed us as an incentive were the salaries of those specialised folks within certain professions we had interest in.  Anywhere from $70 to $200k annually.  To poor kids from Urban America where most of us just get assimilated straight into the workforce with the promise of minimum wage, that is like dangling a steak in front of a hungry tiger.

 

This is number three of my short list:  College & Employment

 

 

High School Graduates and College Graduate Start Out The Same

 

The only hope you have of earning those kinds of salaries upon graduating from a four year college, graduate school and/or a residency if applicable is work experience.  The difference between a college graduate and a high school graduate upon graduation is basically career versus job.  Chris Rock was definitely correct on that front during his skit regarding the two.

 

As a high school graduate, the most you can hope for is a job with little advancement until you receive a degree/certificate.  With the degree/certificate you do have the potential to advance faster than a college graduate due to consistent work experience and how long it takes them to learn the job.

 

A college graduate with little actual work experience and/or history will start out on the same rung as a high school graduate.  It may take a few years to get the work experience the high school graduate already has but advancement offers will be more numerous due to the degree.  If it's one thing I remember from working is being offered a promotion only to be asked "Do you have a bachelor's degree?"

 

As a high school graduate, a job is a necessity.  It is something you need and you experience every hour working with a few euphoric moments of lunch and leaving.  What college gives you, if you take more practical courses like Business, Accounting or a specialty profession like Nursing, Medicine, Law etc, is how to run a business and therefore your own career.  The business you learn how to operate is you.  Instead of "working for the man" college, if done right, teaches you how to "work for yourself".  A job becomes not a necessity but a stepping stone to further a career.

 

 

Don't Expect A Million Bucks and a Sports Car

 

A lot of students entering college, and some during high school, start spending their savings in anticipation of a high yield salary.  The raw truth is, unless you have previous work experience that you fit in during high school and college classes do not expect to make above minimum wage when you get started.  The degree only means you can pass go and collect your $200 promotion but you still have to play the game and pay up to get there.

 

One of the most recurrent conversations I heard while in high school was "When I become a doctor/lawyer/stockbroker I'm gonna wear Armani suits, buy three houses and take vacations in Tahiti!"  Even then I was the only one laughing in amusement instead of sitting in awe of the brilliant light that was their blinding enthusiasm for their imagination.  You shouldn't spend what you do not have.  Those same braggerts would spend entire paychecks on a pair of shoes or a leather jacket to, I don't know, mold themselves into the illusion?

 

Several years later when bumping into them after their college graduation they first tried so desperately to keep up the illusion and soon ended up broke and dillusioned.  They never utilised the college degree they, at the end, just picked an easy subject simply to graduate and get out.  They gave up before college graduation while viewing the quarterly debt that was quickly piling up.  They eagerly strutted into college with dreams of earning $150k a year after graduation only to leave with that same amount or twice as much in debt from college loans and no enthusiasm to pay them off.

 

 

A Degree Is Not A Limitation

 

I also know a lot of folks who are so specific about their degree and the jobs they target during job search.  A degree should not be a limitation or ball and chain so parlay it into a career.  That is why you went to college in the first place.  You have a bachelor's degree in law but need to go to law school in order to fulfill your dream of becoming a lawyer.  You can't afford to go right away due to college debt so where the heck to you find work with only entry level positions open?  So what if it's entry level.  It's a stepping stone to get where you want to go.  If you want to specialise in medical law why only search for work in a law firm?  Try a hospital.  Get a real life feel for the place and imagine them as your future clients.  Whether it is the patients or the staff.  Personal Injury law or sports injury lawyer.  Getting real life experience about your future customer base will give you an edge.

 

Want to be a doctor?  You can start out as a nurse, paramedic, EMT, firefighter, technician, orderlie or physician's assistant.  A parallel job to kick off your career.  You should pace yourself because a career is supposed to be something you love to do instead of have to do in order to pay bills.  There's no rush.

 

 

Turn What You Love Into Your Career

 

It may sound corny but it is true.  A career is you life's work so it should be something you want to do and love to do for the rest of your life as you are able.  Tony Hawk, Bill Gates and even Donald Trump (he made himself his career) parlayed their love and passion in life into lucrative ventures.

 

 

Being A Parent Is Not A Career To Be Ashamed Of

 

I always wanted to work for myself and never worked with the objective of simply obtaining a job in mind.  The first step I took in my career was in high school.  I volunteered at the school's college office and soon got my first job at age 15 at a family owned stock photography company.  I could have simply sat at the desk they gave me and do the job they gave me.   That's just not me though.  I went from department to department asking questions, hanging around and offering my eager hands for other assignments.  I basically created a new job description around me at 16; Department Asst.  They made it official a year later and gave me a raise.

 

It wasn't that I liked money.  I was single, a teen, no dependents, no major expenses past transporation to get to and from school since I walked over to work from school.  I've always wanted to own my own business so I took advantage of the situation I was in to learn how to run a company and get paid for it.  My favourite spot to hang out was the Human Resources Department.  

 

When the company no longer satisfied my curiosity and thirst my mum suggested the Temporary Employment Agencies.  I made the first step to becoming self-employed at the age of 18 and worked as a temp until I was 24.  I was curious about so many different levels of business and how the cogs all worked together.  I took several job recruiter assignments just to satisfy my curiousity about Human Resources.

 

My hourly pay by then had reached $22/hour.  Suddenly I was sent to so many different companies in so many industries I was sad when the assignments ended so I made the best of it searching out many different executives, employees and professionals to pick their collective brains.  I saw it as getting paid to learn.  I was a bit disappointed during my brief stint at Atlantic Records because they really burst the bubble I had about the music business.

 

I had my own business by the age of 26 and made $150k one year, still without a college degree, before realising it was never about the money and status for me.  There was nothing for me to feel guilty or ashamed about.  The only thing I've ever wanted, was to stay home with any future kids and have a simple happy life.  Thankfully for me my current partner has the same dream.  I've made our household into my business doing contract work from home.  I am not interested in earning money to obtain fast depreciating and quickly replacable material items.  I like a sustained existence.  Which is why I'm looking into mircofarming and all the experience I acquired from the corporate world has helped me out wonderfully.  Our household should see it's first "profit" by 2013.  I have been at home, and self employed, for the entire 5 years of our youngest child's life.

 

A career does not have to be exceedingly lucrative as long as it is always satisfying.  Profitable doesn't hurt either.

 

5 Things I Wish I Had Been Taught In School: Real Life Pregnancy Planning

I know I touched on having a Pregnancy Fund in #5, yet I feel the need to expand this subject since it's critical.  This is my #4 of things I wish I had been taught in school.  Pregnancy planning should be a part of everyone's crisis fund.  You never know when you'll end up being the next of kin for a relative or have a sudden downturn in the economy where you are suddenly struggling financially and pregnant.  I have been in the latter and thought I'd share.

 On television sitcoms and movies there is always that one pregnant lady who goes out on maternity leave.  As a child, tween, teen and then young adult you actually believe what is show to be common place.  It is only when you are older, having never imagined the situation you would find yourself in, that you find out how rare finding a company withpaid maternity leave is and that is if they offer it at all.  Most pregnant women find themselves without employment if they cannot return after using up every sick, holiday and vacation day they have.

 I worked at a small business until I was nine months pregnant, just like most every other pregnant woman in the United States does.  You try to work as long as possible, to save as much as possible, to tide you over with bills until you can return to work.  After giving birth, even though it would be best to spend the first months bonding with your newborn, most new parents return to work immediately after first finding suitable child care.  Instead of offering parental leave, most US companies that employees seek like the holy grail are the ones who provide on-site child care.  Every time someone sneers at a working mother I feel the urge to smack them with a folded chair.  I may have spent one too many days watching WWF as a child but it always feels like it would be satisfying when I think of it.  Alas, aggravated assault is not something I would like to be charged with.

 I was stuck in a quandry with no idea about the resources available.  The first thing most people will tell you is "Go get welfare."  Well, I'm not a welfare kind of person so I began searching for alternatives.  Since I worked simultaneously at a Recruiting Office and a Mergers and Acquisitions firm filing Profit & Loss statements all day I decided to create one for our household to see where we stood and get ideas for increasing our income while decreasing our expenses.  One bit of advice I did receive from my employer(s) was to apply for Temporary Disability with the State, which I did.  I made $400 a week before delivery and birth and Temporary Disability only paid $150 - $200 a week.  The search for supplementation and expense reduction began.

 I had an extensive cookbook collection at that time, most of them being culinary textbooks worth $150 a book.  I found eBay.  I also went back to my college cooking habits which was to buy meat in bulk, package it for storage and plan meals for the month around it.  I had worked as a temp before so I began doing contract office work without an agency.  Resume writing, envelope stuffing for my former employer and other office odd jobs.  Between eBay, odd jobs from home and Temporary Disability, I made my previous salary.

 I believe I also went a bit haywire reducing our energy bill.  Other than food, energy sucks up most of your income.  You have to become enterprising to generate income while taking care of a newborn.  Now, I know someone somewhere is saying "Why didn't you go to Social Services?"  Well there is such a thing as not qualifying.  It happens.  I wanted to leave Social Services as the last resort though.  I could have just not tried the alternatives I did and gone straight to Social Services but then I would have never started my own business.

 I worked in so many industries that I have a variety of talents and Marketing was one of them even though I do not have a formal degree for it.  I found myself innundted with website design requests, requests for flyers, resume help, all the while trying to fit in the envelope stuffing for my former employer.  I eventually had to drop my former employer since I was fully booked.  No one was more shocked than I was.  I did do a few contract jobs for them after but never became re-employed.

 As I said before, I worked as a temp before accepting employment with my former employer.  I've been an independent contractor since two years after leaving high school.  I accepted assignments from several different companies at varying amounts.  Anywhere, back then, from $6.50 to $25 per hour.  An assignment came in; I took it.  Work is work is work to me.  I confess, this is why Social Services never entered my mind at the time.  I have never been a conventional "worker bee".

 

Resources -  Baby Clothing & Products

 There are several places you can get clothing at discount prices.  One overlooked neighbourhood resource is your local garage sales.  I've washed, folded and stored baby clothes that were only worn for a week before the baby outgrew them.  I'm sure every parent does that.  The bottles, out grown car seats, shoes etc are all stored until a donation bin was spotted in the supermarket parking lot or a notice from the Salvation Army was posted on the community boards. 

There is also your local Thrift shops and eBay of course.  Local pickup would be best if you do not have cash to deal with shipping fees.

 Another source for clothing that no once seems to utilise as they did in the old days are hand-me-downs.  When I shopped for my daughter after my son was born I made sure to buy gender neutral clothes with only a few sex specific items.  Even shoes were neutral.  When my son grew he wore his older sister's hand-me-downs.  My youngest daughter wore a 11 year old shirt that all her siblings wore 2 years ago and it was still in great condition when I donated it to the thrift shop.

 

 Resources - Food

 I never bought any pre-packaged baby food with the exception of formula and applesauce.  I had a baby only blender and a metal steamer.  Steam, then puree.  I grew up eating from my granmother's garden.  The only food items we purchased were spices, staples like flour, sugar, baking powder, dairy and salt.  The meat we got from my aunt's farm.  Vegetables are one of the most expensive foods to purchase.  Even though you may not be able to have an outdoor garden, you can still container garden or try aquaponics (fish and vegetables) in an urban dwelling.  Cuts down on food costs.

 There are other alternatives available within the community such as Women, Infants and Children (WIC), Food Pantries and Nutritional Supplement (Food Stamps).  Food stamps are not just for "low income households" and are used widely by many middle income households in suburbia.  I like to think of it as the government making up for not offering national parental leave.  These programmes were created to help families with children and other needy people such as the homeless, elderly and disabled.  You can search for Food Pantries in your area here: 

http://feedingamerica.org/foodbank-results.aspx

 

Resources - Family & Friends

 The one thing that is critical to parenting is having a support group.  Whether it is neighbourhood parents, your parents, relatives, close friends or all of the above a solid support group is required.  When a newborn comes home they are awake every 3 hours.  Feed, burp, change, and sleep.  Hopefully.  Every 3 hours.  There is not much sleep to be had.  It is not the physical activity that sucks the most energy out of you; it's the baby crying.  It's like each wail serves as a hook that yanks your energy strand by strand until you are completely beyond exhaustion.

 When I had my first child, I was surrounded by my now ex-partner's family, then my mum and sister.  When I had my second child, I had only my partner.  Things ran much smoother having more than two people watching and caring for the baby.  Not to mention, providing much required alone time, even if it is for a half hour to hour in the shower all by yourself.  It's a wonderful idea to set up a support group well before a baby arrives.  It prevents unnecessary stress.

 

5 Things I Wished I Had Been Taught In School: Personal Finance

There were a few nasty surprises I encountered as a "newly minted adult" that I wish someone had warned me about.  Here is #5 on my short list.

 Number 5:  Personal Finance is more than balancing a checkbook

 I did get an A in that by the way.  Managing personal financing is more about anticipating your needs and planning accordingly.  Knowing what your income versus expenses are quarterly since they bloody well fluctuate during season changes.  Knowing if your household, even if it's just you, is running in the black.  I have found Quarterly (even monthly) Profit & Loss sheets to be excellent at helping figure it all out and make projections for the next quarter.  

 Quarterly Profit & Loss Sheet - Household

A Quarterly Profit & Loss sheet for a household also helps pinpoint where the hell all your cash is going and plugging those leaks from draining your Income bucket.

 So how does a P&L work?  

 Income

Employment

Odd Jobs

Garage Sales

eBay

Parents/Allowance/Trustfund

Interest

Winnings

 

Expenses

Rent/Mortgage

Electric/Gas

Transportation

Food - Groceries

Food - Take Out/Delivery/Eat Out

Paper Goods

Telephone - Land

Telephone - Cell

Internet

Entertainment

Laundry

Misc

 Subtract your expenses from your income and you have exactly what your Net worth is or how well you're doing saving.  I know my ex-teacher was all about "pay yourself first" and "put 10% of your paycheck in the bank".  Sometimes, with the amount of expenses, that's just not possible.  With the P&L sheets I have been using since 2000, I've been able to pinpoint a section to reduce so I am able to save something.  Changing habits = reduced expenses.  Another part of Personal Finance that was sorely lacking from my education was Crisis Planning.  

 Crisis Fund

Whether you save 10% or 100% of your, ahem, "Profit" you shouldn't consider it actual "Savings" yet until you start to exceed your Crisis Planning fund.  Crisises like parental leave for new parents, lay off or a medical emergency.  Yes, your insurance will cover the medical cost.  Who will pay your bills while you are out of work though?  Bills do not take breaks or vacations, even if you do get forebearance for some things, at the end of that you will be expected to pay, sometimes with interest.  Crisis funds should be stocked up for a minimum of three months of expenses though I prefer six months to a year for safety's sake.

 The vast majority of employers in the United States do not offer paid parental leave.  There is the option of applying for State Temporary Disability due to Pregnancy but that will only net you a fraction, and a very small one, of your income per month.  Even if you have no plans to get pregnant, get someone pregnant or adopt/surrogate/foster you should incorporate potential expenses into your Crisis Fund.  It's like getting sick; no one plans for that to happen either.  It is the practical thing to do.  

 

You could create a separate Pregnancy Fund if you like, just remember that whatever your expenses are double them.  A baby is an entire separate person and not a roommate with a steady adult income.  There are programmes you can apply for after delivery and birth where the baby will have an income.  Such as, Women, Infants and Children (W.I.C) and Nutrition Supplement (Food Stamps) whether you are low to medium income.  Think of it as the government's form of making up for no national parental leave.  Every potential parent, whether you are single, married, cohabitating, LGBT or straight, should have a pregnancy/parental fund.  What is also as important as Crisis and Pregnancy funds is the knowledge of Debt Management.

 Revolving Debt Management: Credit Equals Debt

 It took me trial, error and staggering credit card debt to figure this out.  The main part of the credit part of debt management, and your credit report in general is this;  PAY YOUR DAMN BILLS ON TIME.  That is what the majority of your credit score is based on.  Payment History.  Balances fluctuate but if you are a bastard of a customer?  That sticks to you like shi...well you get the point.

 The trick to paying credit cards on time that no one tells you is this.  There are two dates.  One you see and one you don't see.  When you get your bill there is a Due Date.  You believe you're fine since you've mailed out your payment or paid online a week in advance.  Then you wait until the payment clears and go shopping.  The next bill comes in and you see that it says you were over your limit the month before and think "What the hell!?  I paid the bill!  How could I be overlimit!?"  That is due to the second date.  It's called your Statement Closing date.  

 Okay, let's say your due date says April 7, 2011 and your statement closing date is on the 15th.  You pay your previous bill amount online by the 7th wait until the payment clears and then go shopping.  Whatever amount you've racked up by the 15th is what will show on your next bill.  So, while you might be ontime you are now overlimit and showing bad money management behaviour.   First thing you do when getting a new credit card is find out when your statement closes.  You can also request that it be changed.

 To prevent going overlimit, pay your bill by the statement closing date instead of the due date.  Whatever amount is on the card, pay it down to 10% of your credit limit by the statement closing date.  By, meaning before the statement closing date and don't use your card until after that date.  When you receive your next statement in the mail, if you have a $1000 credit limit and paid it down to 10% your balance due should be $100.  On time and showing good money management.  Easiest way to begin managing your debt and getting a solid credit score.

 There are other things like negotiating debt payments with creditors.  I've paid off $25k in debt for only $3k one year by calling them up, usually when it's around 4 to 5 years in, and saying "I have this much right now. Take it or leave it and I want the settlement deal faxed in writing before I pay you."  I picked a high percentage of the debt for charge off without totally being insulting, that we could start negotiations at.  Say, 65% off.  So if it was originally $1500, I'd offer to pay $525 and see what happens.  Only one place negotiated a lower percentage for a debt of $300.  I offered $105 at 65% off and they countered with $180 at 40% off.

 You should only do this with those creditors you actually intend on settling with that day or your debt resets to the date you made new contact.  Shows up as a new charge off and hurts your credit score.  If the debt is over 7 years old, it should not be on your credit report and the creditors should not be contacting you.  Dispute it for removal.  They'll have to provide original paperwork to prove it's recent.  You could still do like the majority does and simply wait the 7 years.

 Installment Accounts

 I would not go over four revolving credit card accounts and FICO recommends having at least one installment account (car note, student loan, other loan) on your credit report.  Ever get that note "Not enough credit history"?  Same as revolving credit accounts, pay your bills on time.

 

Resources

 A great place to hang out for all your credit score needs?  MyFICO: (http://ficoforums.myfico.com/fico/)  A credit score is the difference between a 3% APR and a 49% APR.  If you don't know what I mean, I'll put it in terms of money.  If you have a balance on your credit card of $1000 for a year, the interest you pay at 3% is $16.16.  At 49%?  It's $233. (Credit Card Payment Calculator: http://www.csgnetwork.com/creditcardcalc.html).  Credit cards make you wish you hadn't used "Where, in real life, will I ever use this crap!?" as an excuse not to pay attention in Math class.

I have yet to figure out 401(k) and IRAs but I understand Certificates of Deposits (CDs) just fine.  I use these unless the bank is offering a savings account with a better interest rate.  Explaining 401(k) and IRAs to me would have been nice you schmucks!

 

I Can Only Be Me - Eva Cassidy

Crazy Stuff: The Wackiest Job Ever

I've worked in a lot of industries, okay maybe a few industries, in my life.  The one I had most fun in was the service industry.  Somewhere in one of those back posts I told you about working for my ex's family restaurant.  It was fun for a while because I could escape him while cooking, baking, or even doing deliveries unless he tagged along.

Deliveries were fun because you never knew who you'd meet at the other end.  I've seen naked WWF wrestlers, naked WWF girls, naked wedding parties, and a whole slew of drunk folks.  I'd have to say I really did enjoy the naked WWF guy, think his name was Brock something.  Who doesn't like naked men answering their hotel rooms then walking away to get their wallets?  You'd watch those buns too.

Then there are those wedding parties.  Let me tell anyone who plans a reception in a hotel this.  We.  Will.  Remember. You.  Trust me.  There was one bachelor party that we delivered $150 worth of food to.  We took the food up to the room and knocked on the door.  The door whips open and there's a naked guy standing there.  I am accustomed to seeing naked dicks by this poing but not the poor Mexican bus boy who's eyes are about falling out of his head.  He wasn't much use after that, with his eyes rolling all over the place, anywhere but where the customer was standing.  It's hilarious now but I was pissed at the guy because not only is he naked, he's stoned off his gourd.

So this guy starts telling us to bring the food in.  My poor bus boy takes three steps into the room before I crash into his back.  I'm trying to figure out why the hell he stopped so I peek around his torso.  The room is filled with naked men and women.  Not only that but they are all in various sexual positions I've never seen outside the covers of the Kama Sutra.  The man turns to see what's keeping us and finally realises that there are people fucking in the room.  His eyebrows hit his hairline and he starts apologising as he walks us back out of the room.

We're now back in the hallway, he takes the food inside and comes back with a stack of bills.  He peels off exact change for the food.  No tip.  Again, he starts apologising and says how very, very sorry he is but he needs the singles if we get what he means.  By this time the bus boy was muttering in Spanish while holding his cross.  I can't tell you if he was praying or not but that was the last time our bus boy accompanied me on a delivery.  Poor kid was too traumatised.

I've had a few deliveries after that which were just as hilarious.  Like the drunk guy who tried to pay us with several sticks of Doublemint gum and aksed if that should cover it.  Ah.  No.  Or the lady who cheerfully invited me in to her hotel room to put the food on the coffee table where she wanted it, only to whip open a bible and start reverently praying for my soul. 

Yes, I've worked a few place but this job was right up there with when I drove a cab.

Chairlift ~ Bruises

Go Ahead and Whet My Appetite

Okay.  Watering ourselves down just makes us...well...bland.  Easily digestible and therefore not worthy of a second taste or look.  Who wants bland food?  It's the person with that indescribable flavour that you keep coming back to because the taste and textures just keep on surprising you. 

Like our tongues we experience a person depending on which side of our own personality they touch at a particular time.  I remember one guy I went to school with who must have possibly said to hell with us all and finally was himself.  Suddenly he was just interesting.  You could spend time around this guy and never get bored.

He could be bitter, fiery, sweet, cold, smooth, sharp, hard, soft, warm, salty and goldanged interesting.  He made us insatiable.  It's been almost 20 years and I'd say he's the one of the very few people from HS I can actually remember and would want to see again. 

Never be bland.

Life: How to Use the Recipe

There was a lady who I was speaking to who was absolutely at the end of her rope with cooking.  She kept saying in the most bewildered voice "But I followed the recipe step by step.  I don't know what I'm doing wrong."  Well, here's the thing about cooking.  When you follow a recipe step by step you develop tunnel vision and forget that when it comes to food....well...food requires all five of your senses.  Sight, touch, taste, sound and smell.  Following a recipe, you will only be focused on one.  Sight.  As in "Okay.  Tossed that in.  What's the next step?"  You're not even focused on the food, just what's written in the book.

Another thing about recipes is that you are following, step by step, the taste buds of someone else.  Unless you have their taste buds, it will never taste quite the same.  It may be too salty, sweet or something.  Go watch a five star restaurant chef cook and you will see that they almost never use recipes and usually spend time composing their own.  They are wholly immersed in the food.  Immersed in the experience of cooking.  All senses are involved.

The sound of olive oil hitting a skillet that is heated just right.  The taste of a sauce that has been reduced to the right consistency.  The feel of a freshly caught fish where the skin bounces back when poked.  The smell of a perfectly baked cheesecake.  Mmmmm.....  The sight of a perfectly cooked shrimp or scallop.  A cookbook can never accurately tell you to the second when things are done but can only give you an estimated time, temperature or colour.  You have to experience it yourself in order to truly understand.  To be truly be passionate about it.

Life is the same as cooking.  Someone may hand you a cookbook that gives you estimates of how things should happen.  A book of suggestions.  Like fairy tales.  Your Prince Charming will be tall, dark and handsome.  That's just a suggestion.  How tall?  How dark?  What's your definition of handsome?  Are you sure it's a he?  You will hear the bells ring and the earth will move beneath your feet when you fall in love.  Another suggestion.  You could despise him on sight until you get to know him better or nothing happens and you look at him one day to realise you love him. That's life.  You have to invest all five senses in life in order to feel passionate about anything you experience in it.

You have to see people for who they are.  You have to listen to who they say they are.  You have to leave yourself open to the touch of love and there is nothing better than the scent of that person you've fallen for.  Call it pheromones if you wish, I just call it....addictive.  You have to go out and take a big bite out of life because it's never ever going to be satisfying to have someone describe the experience to you.

Like cooking, you have to stop and experience your life.  Stop.  Use your senses. Tweak your life like you would your tomato sauce so that your life is what's just right......for you.  Any good cook will tell you that a recipe is for suggestion only.  You have to make the recipe yours.  You have options to take out, or add in, ingredients and flavours to your liking.  It's your life.  Don't get so caught up following a general diagram that's not tailored to you...that you forget to live.  If you are not passionate about your life....you are not really living.

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Solved! Which Came First Chicken or Egg II

I'm guessing I confused some folks so here we go again.

Hmmm...maybe I view this question differently than everyone else.  I've always thought people viewed it as a procreation question.  lol 

Chicken being living thing and egg meaning place where living thing was created.  How can you create a living thing if the component is missing and how can the component be there if the living thing didn't create it?  See.

To me they can't exist without each other and I thought my solution covered everything.  *raises eyebrow*  What was always missing from this question for me was the other component that is needed in order to start the catalyst that begins creation.

Egg doesn't mean chicken egg.  There's two types of reproduction, Asexual and Sexual. 

Within Sexual Reproduction, there are two types again, egg laying and internal embryonic development.  Both egg laying and internal embryonic development require an ovum and spermatozoa.  Fertilization.  Penetration is not necessary for some species since they have their own interpretation of in-vitro fertilization better known as external fertilization. 

Then there are ants.  Whew!  Didn't know ants were that special.  Unfertilized ant eggs become the male drones and fertilized eggs become the female workers and queens.  How's that for immaculate conception.

So, either way, an egg is just an egg and a chicken is just a chicken both the egg and the chicken exist at the same time because the eggs were created at the same time the chicken was.  You need fertilization before there is a chicken.

Should be which came first, fertilization or the chickens but then you'd actually have to explain that to kids.  lol 

We don't want to be saying "Which came first?  The dinosaur or the egg?"  We'd first have to find out when Sexual Reproduction came into existence and how.